ASK ME HOW I KNOW AND I'LL TELL YOU SO: I can't remember if I've ever posted here about a cool recent discovery: I'm buying ARCs (advance review copies) of my favorite authors on eBay. Huh? Basically when a writer I like has a book coming out (like Nick Hornby or Lee Child, recently), I bid on and win a pre-release ARC of their upcoming book. Thus far I've been able to score the ARCs for about the cost of a hardcover, with the added benefit that they're oversized paperbacks, which I much prefer. Plus my impatience is indulged, and I get to wander 'round the aiport lounges looking cool and/or connected and maybe even a touch mysterious, right?

And so I'm sad to report that Hornby's latest, A LONG WAY DOWN, is pretty much a stinker. And I hate hate hate to write that, since I really admire Nick as a writer, and I've really loved all three of his novels to date (HIGH FIDELITY, ABOUT A BOY, HOW TO BE GOOD), loved the short story collection he edited and contributed to (SPEAKING WITH THE ANGEL), loved the reading I saw him give at the New Yorker Festival a few years ago, loved his music and books essays (SONGBOOK and THE POLYSYLLABIC SPREE) and just generally found him to be the writer-I'd-love-to-grow-up-to-be in recent years.

What's the matter with the new one then? Well, first, I'll tell you a little about it. Hornby writes it from four different POVs, affecting the voices of four wildly different characters who meet one New Year's Eve as they're contemplating suicide atop a tall building in London. Amazon or somebody on Amazon describes the novel as Camus meets THE BREAKFAST CLUB, which pretty much convinced me I would absolutely love it. Alas, trouble is that each of the four characters comes across as Hornby in their character's drag, putting on their personas instead of occupying them. Very little happens, apart from midly clever dialog and asides (I mean, the guy can still write a nice sentence, and he's incapable of being anything but charming, no matter what desperate voice he channels), and unlike previous Hornby books I actually found myself considering abandonment along the way. I'm not quite done yet, either, I'm idling some twenty or thirty pages from the end, with little motivation to find out what comes next, which tells you all you need to know.

I'm not mad I read it, not mad I bought the ARC, etc. I'd still rather spend time with Hornby on a bad day than with most other writers on their best day. But after going three-for-three, old Nick has had a bit of a slip here, and I'd be surprised if even he wasn't aware of it.