PROCREATION CAN BE HAZARDOUS TO YOUR MENTAL HEALTH: So it's two nights in a row my nearly three-year-old son C.J. has decided to get up -- and stay up -- at 4:30AM. Meanwhile his two-month-old brother -- the one who's supposed to be causing trouble -- sleeps like a champ. Since I've turned in 'round midnight both nights, I'm going on precious little sleep. My wife is in worse shape, although she somehow maintains a reservoir of good humor. Last night I, on the other hand, really hit an anger level that I haven't hit before. I wasn't just annoyed or frustrated...hell, far as I can tell parenting is about 80% low-level frustration...I was mad. Still, it passed, no harm no foul, etc. But it reminded me how desperate and irrational lack of sleep can make a person. I had no logical mental processes going on. I just wanted to shake the boy.

We survived.

And perhaps the reason he was up was because of an exchange he and I had had earlier in the evening. My wife was out to dinner with a friend, so I had both boys. We were prepping to head out on a car trip over to a friend's house. I had the baby all set, but CJ the Elder was running from me, evading his jacket. I told him to stop, and he yelled NO at me. I grabbed his arm and shoved it into his coat sleeve, telling him in very direct and firm tones, "You *never* say no to Daddy." I then walked him to the front door and paused, thinking I'd reinforce the point: "Are you going to tell Daddy no again?"

He started to say no, then stopped. He started to say yes, then stopped. Realizing I'd inadvertently given him a unsolvable koan, I let him off the hook. "I know you're going to do what daddy says," I told him.

"Yes!" he said.

Maybe the 4:30 wakeup had something to do with solving the koan.