GOOGLE OF THE DAY: Someone from the Federal Bureau of Prisons went to Google...typed in "beer camel photo"...and found themselves here. A big shout-out to the FBofP!

Wow. So I go over to the FBofP website, just for kicks, and here's what I learn:

There are 130 Mike Smiths in their inmate registry. (Not all are incarcerated. Recent releasees also appear.)

There are "constant openings" for new correctional officers at facilities across the country.

At 37, I am too old to apply for one of those jobs.

Having a family member in prison does not disqualify one from becoming a prison guard. (I mean "correctional officer."

There is no minimum age for corrections officers.

Corrections officers must be able to perform the following physical duties: walking/standing up to an hour; seeing a human figure at a distance of one quarter mile or a target at 250 yards; hearing and detecting movement; using firearms; performing self-defense movements; running an extended distance; climbing stairs; lifting, dragging, and carrying objects; and smelling smoke and drugs.