SHORT IDEAS THAT DESERVE LONG ESSAYS: I always marvel at columnists and bloggers who say how tough it is to come up with new ideas everyday. My problem isn't the new ideas, it's making time to actually explore all the crap that flies through my head.

Today's list of stuff that deserves greater exploration:

Who's the real villain in this year's PROJECT GREENLIGHT? Chris Moore? The directors? That arrogant studio putz? Ben? I veer between thinking Moore is an asshole and a hero. And this Shia kid is just lights-out fantastic.

Why does everyone say Liz Phair's new record sucks? I think it's her second best, after EXILE.

Today a handyman came over to my house and fixed windows, doors, light fixtures, sinks, etc. I'd like to explore the emasculating side of having another guy in your hosue, fixing your shit -- versus that creepy feeling of, "Yes, now do the next thing I tell you." Which is worse, being a putz who can't fix shit, or being the guy who has to answer to some "lord of the manor" goof like me? Which is not to say I'm not a nice lord of the manor, 'cause I am. Oh, and I'd explore the angle of my wife watching in awe as he fixes her lamp, and looking at me like, "Why can't you do that?"

Last night's conversation with Doug, a guy in my wine group, about how you make it on the floor of the Mercantile Exchange. "I'd say height is way more important than brains," he told me. "Tall guys always get their order taken before shorter guys." So where does brains come in? "Way down the list. First you need a financial backer, or some access to big bucks. Then you need to be connected. Then you need to be tall and aggressive. Maybe smarts is next after that." What a bizarre profession! I'd like to do a Surowiecki-style exploration of this.