10.03.2005

THE ACCIDENTAL HUMORIST: I've noticed that people seem to think I'm joking these days when I'm not. I wore my snazzy new NASCAR t-shirt to an indie-rock street fair not too long ago, and several different people smiled at me and said, "That's great," as if I was wearing it tongue-in-cheek. And then a little while back a neighbor garbage-picked a giant statue of Hotei, also known as the Laughing Buddha, and placed it front of our house in our little Asian-styled garden area. Again, neighbors are nudging me at the park saying "love your Buddha." "I know," I say. "I love it too!" They smile even bigger, as if I'm just too much.

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yeah! and Ishtar is the best movie you've ever seen!

Scott Hess said...

Another perfect example. I have the poster in my office, and the newish woman in the office next door looked at it and laughed. I swear to God it's my favorite movie for unironic reasons. I don't like it because it's bad. I like it because I think it's very good.

Scott Hess said...

Yes, but few can miss my width these days...

P said...

i think that your hidden quirks are awesome. i suspect that those that think you're jesting may only see the flawless, uber-conventional veneer that is day-to-day scott. truly you are a man with a fine-tuned, lovingly crafted public persona; the cultivation of which requires self-control not known to many. this is not to say that you are not portraying you as you, but those of us fortunate enough to see your wacky cannonballing, kitchen-farting side are none too surprised to see it shimmering there in the glassy depths.

Anonymous said...

Oh my God!

Anonymous said...

I'd almost like to be anonymous, too, but, instead I will just say that I love my daughter's in law, they give me so many good laughs! Keep up the good work.

P said...

i'm confused!

Scott Hess said...

I'll translate: I think Roma is very amused by the fact that you pointed out my kitchen-farting...and yet at the same time she's wrestling with her desire to come off as more civilized than that...

P said...

ah -- i thought she might have been in cahoots with the cryptic anonymous blogger!

L. said...

Fine-tuned? Not.
Self-control? Not.
Fortunate? Not.
Kitchen-farting? Unfortunately, Yes

I agree. Well done, Paula.

L. said...

Oh, and Roma. Well done to you too. Daughter's in law? Is that kinda' like Attorney's General? Who the heck remember that kinda' grammer?
L.

Scott Hess said...

A neighbor-friend stopped me tonight. "Nice Buddha," she said, giving me the thumbs up. "Hilarious!"


Granted, the plastic statue was garbage-picked by our neighbor, but I still think he's pretty cool.

Laurel, are you misunderestimating me? I think I want Paula's description on my tombstone.

L. said...

No misunderstanding. I understand and agree with Paula completely. I'm just giving you shit...'cause I can.
L.
The only thing missing was she could have snuck in the way you always have to announce when you have to take a crap.

Scott Hess said...

Maybe I should start doing that on this blog! Good idea.

Just finished a Starbucks old-fashioned donut and am working on a double-tall latte...

I'm just sayin'.

Anonymous said...

they ARE a jug band! and really lke potty-talk!

P said...

who is that anonymous? is that you, tom hess?

Scott Hess said...

I still think Laurel needs her own blog. Her malaprops and mis-readings are high-level comedy.

L. said...

Is someone talking about my jugs? Malaprops? What the hell's a malaprop?

How do I start a blog? Don't I have to take a class or something? I can't even hook up my scanner (got it for my birthday last Feb. and I'm still staring at it in the box) let alone start a blog.
L.